The Badly Written Inuyasha Soap Opera
by Tenka no Miko
Summary: Something my friend and I wrote when I was on the phone: Kagome is going to die in 10 minutes! She can't get any, either! What is this pathetic miko to do?


a/n- this is an idea for an amazingly dramatic inuyasha soap opera. it ish called: THE SOAP OPERA THAT WUZ NEVER TOLD!

The scene starts at night. Why night time? Because I said so, dammit! So, anyway, it's night time where this huge, elaborately decorated mansion is. In Japan. Why Japan? Cause that's where the Inuyasha gang lives! And this where our story takes place.

A girl with raven black was lying dramatically on the couch. She looked up at the hanyou that was looking down at her.

"Inuyasha!" she said, putting her hand on her forehead... dramatically.

"Yes my love!" Inuyasha says, just as dramatically. They look into each others eyes.

5 hours later...

And they're still looking into each others eyes. And they look like they're about to cry. Inuyasha blinks. Kagome sits up from her dramatic postion on the couch and points at him.

"That look in your eye! It's like the one that you used to give Kikyo! I don't love you anymore!" she declares, storming up to her room. We hear a door slam. And the authoress and her friend on the phone die laughing from too much drama.

But, up it Sango's house-sized room, there is even more drama brewing.

"Miroku! There is something that I need to tell you." Sango says, placing her hand on her forehead like she was about to faint. Miroku looks at her, and a lightbulb goes out... dramatically.

"Yes, Sango, my dearest love, my peach blossom, my rose of thorns..." and the compliments go on for hours. My friend and I feel our eyes twitching from this poorly written soap opera. But, Miroku finally stops after extremely threatening glares from us.

"I..." very dramatic pause. "am..." another very dramatic pause. Lightning flashes outside the window. My friend and I die from the drama... again. "not pregnant." she finally finishes. Miroku looks at Sango, then corners her, then throws her onto the bed.

I AM THE CENSOR GODDESS! YOU SHALL BOW DOWN AND OBEY ME! Or, maybe I'll just censor this part.

Anyway, back to Kagome.

Kagome was pounding her fists on her huge bed, dramatically, crying, very dramatically. We all watch as this crying goes on for hours. She suddenly stops crying when she realizes that there was something pounding on her wall... from the next bedroom over. Which, ironically, was Sango's bedroom. My friend and I throw up and quickly run out of the room. And, once Kagome realized what the noises were, she got... well... something that us girls get when we want a guy. So, she went downstairs and gasped when she saw...

Thought about leaving it here, but it would be too mean, so I'll continue!

Inuyasha making out with Kikyo. "And the drama increases!" a random person says. After me and my friend kill him, we go back to directing this incredibly bad soap opera.

"Inuyasha, you have betrayed me. I'll go and cheat on you by dating your brother!" she says, running out of the room. Dramatically. My friend and I sigh, knowing what was going to happen next.

"NOOOOO! I was too late!" Kagome screams, seeing Sesshomaru making out, dramatically, with some black haired chick. Who, ironically, was Kagome's sister, Sakura Higurashi. She had ankle length black hair that was pulled into a bun, a ponytail coming through the middle of the bun. Sakura also had purple eyes. Not just any purple, but the kind of purple that is a mix between pink and purple. I believe that Crayola calls it Orchid.

Kagome had had enough. "Even more drama!" another random person declares. My friend and I brutally attack him, then come back and finish directing this. Kagome ran. She ran off a cliff, got ran over by a car, got caught in a chemical explosion, and survived. Dunno how, but she also kept a flawless complexion. Well, she got back to the mansion by morning. Inuyasha was still making out with Kikyo, verrry dramatically, but Kagome walked right by them. Dunno how she did this either, but she walked right by a naked couple making out. Talk about your ditzy blonde... Well, mental blonde to say the least. While my friend and I can feel our eyes twitching as we direct this, Kagome walked right up into Koga's guest bedroom. Oh, I think we forgot to mention Koga? Yeah, he's there.

"Koga!" Kagome says, placing her hand on her forehead, dramatically. (man ppl do that a lot!)

"Kagome!" Koga responds, looking at her.

"Koga!"

"Kagome!"

"Koga!"

"Kagome!"

"Koga!"

"Kagome!"

"Koga!"

"Kagome!"

"Koga!"

"Kagome!"

"Koga!"

"Kagome!"

"Koga!"

"Kagome!"

"Koga!"

"Kagome!" My friend sighs and throws a rock at Koga, promptly continuing the scene.

"Koga! I have an incurable disease! I have three minutes left to live!" Kagome says. I nearly throw up from the drama. Koga looks at her and somehow, magically, Kagome ends up on the bed.

"I have two minutes left to live!" she declares, placing her hand on her forehead. My friend and I resist the urge to kill everyone right then and there.

"Kagome! I have something to tell you!" Koga says.

"I have one minute left to live!" Kagome declares, closing her eyes, dramatically.

"But it hasn't been a full minute yet!" Koga clarifys.

"Oh. Well, I have two minutes left to live, then." she corrects, pretending to be dying.

"Kagome, I love you." Koga says. Kagome dies. Koga sighs, unable to do...

THE CENSOR GODDESS IS BACK AGAIN! -insert evil laugh here-

The house blows up, and everyone survives with perfect complexions.

THE END.


End file.
